Missing from the scenes

Its been a long time since I last blogged.

Too many things have happened to me in the span of April.

I had
1) Just recovered from a raging high fever and diarrhoea at the same time I got it;
2) Involved in an accident and ended up forfeiting my insurance premium;
3) Burned a lotta weekends by going to Batam for jobs;

If you believed in karma, trust me, i would have entered Nirvana already.

Anyway, because of something happened in the span of my blogging, I was hesitant if should blog to the feeling of the blogger or should i blog because ppl are reading it? Blogging had always been a source of relaxation to me. But because somehow something happened, I think I should have blogged with caution and perhaps less exciting as before.

SO I must say from this blog onwards, to whoever is reading it...

DISCLAIMER: MY BLOG IS GOOD FOR A READ, BUT NOT TO BE TREATED SERIOUSLY.

So anyway it had been a traumatic April. . its like nothing is smooth in my path for the past 1 mth. the accident, which prompted me to take the public transport after sucha long time. Allowed me to eat humble pie, infused a sense of modesty in me. (esp when you f**ked your foreign workers everyday and you have to face them in the same company transport when you knock off, hardly cool... )

It also taught me that people who knock off that early, can have time to go shopping everyday! It had been sometime since I last visit Lot1, and it had changed a lot. I never left my office after 8pm and Lot1 is like a dead shopping mall waiting for closure when I departed from my office. and people, a lot of people, walked around the mrt station at that hour, 530pm. It was like something I have not experienced ever since my poly days.

I finally got back my ride after 2 days in the workshop. The damage? 4K worth of parts to be replaced. and it is only mine alone. I have not inquired from the insurance company about the other car I banged into on his charges yet. Haiz.. I learned to take it easy. Let go. But its is only 2 months more to my insurance renewal.. and I just banged it away.

Then there's work. I was send to Batam for quite a lot of weekends. 2 weekends. For both weekends, the jobs was uneventful and the last i heard, because of some money issue over there *always is in that country anyway* the entire management was axed. and we had to build rapport all over again.

My foreman was with me one weekend, and something funny happened over there. we were at the departure gates on that Saturday vessel. A group of ppl were giving out freebies at the gates, so they tossed us like 3 packets of chewing gum or something. only to realized.. its CONDOMS. and it reads, BE RESPONSIBLE AND HAVE SAFE SEX etc etc.

My foreman in his late 60's, immediately exclaimed, "HOW CAN I USE THIS? I AM TOO OLD FOR THIS!!?"

*I almost laff out loud* much to my amusement.

and he in the end threw all the condoms to me -_-" because he scared his wife will throw him outta the room and sleep in the living room instead.

So the joke isnt about the foreman here. We took an hr ride and finally managed to checked into the hotel. I immediately fished out all the condoms and threw them on the bed and exclaimed to my foreman, "WAH really a lotta condoms leh!"

but we had to work you see, so we immediately changed into our teletubby overalls and went to the shipyard. it is around evening when we finally finished our work, and I was surprised to find a chambermaid cleaning my toilet when I enter my room.
I took no notice and started to change, so right in the midst of putting on my shirt, the maid came out of the toilet and looked at me, "SIr i finished cleaning your toilet"

Half-expecting a tip or something from me, *because it is the culture there* she diverted her attention to the bed, (with the loads of condoms) and take looking at my half-naked self, she immediately LEFT THE ROOM!

*Wah lao, someone must have taken me for a sexpert or something.. -_-" *

Because of my work committments in Batam, I burned my weekends without much sleep.

then the awful big illness came and struck me on the coming week. I had a minor flu and was recovering from it. then devil suggested we have a big meal at sunset way. I obliged anyway since it had been a long time since we met.

Maybe the flu weaked my stomach, or perhaps the seafood over at Sunset way were really dirty. that I do not know. I developed a high fever and persistant diarrhoea that tramatized me for the next couple of days. I seen 2 doctors so far and took 3 days of medical leave. I hardly took that long for medical leaves.

As far as I knew, this is perhaps my most severe illness I ever encountered. INfact it is only today, my fever subsided and my diahorra didnt gave me much of problem. *but the stools is still watery though, kinda disgusting, so to speak*

Luckily there's a labour day holiday coming, I can make sure of the day to recuperate. I hope May will be a better month for me.

thus this ends my blog for this month. Have a nice day peeps.

Signs & Sighs

I am going present to you guys today...

A very raw perspective of myself. It's gonna be like a blue moon kinda blog which I hardly expressed in words, and for most to see.

I think... i come to a point in my life, where my peace, is once again interrupted by people whom I least expected to send tremors in my inner thoughts. or stir a fluttering of heart. But in this case, which I did, and questioned myself ever so vigourously, if I am really reacting correctly, or was I just plain lonely?

I am not sure how I shld start this, but it started innocently enough when my clerk, whom is deeply infatuated with my ex-asst mgr whom is supposedly to be married. Started to introduced me to a bunch of 3 gal colleagues.

They are 3 very ordinary gals. One worked for an angmoh boss, whom doesnt look very appealing in the looks dept, and the rest are the receptionist whois absolutely a stunner, and another gal, who is working for my bigger boss, equally stunning.

The thing is, life is sometimes fair, readers would have expected the looks-not-so-ideal gal is probably single, and you're right. and the 2 of the stunners, one Sporean, the other msian, married. But still under 30's.

Of course we din started out talking about our maritial status, only through other ppl, we managed to know a bit about each other. (But of course they nvr knew me, I am the sort that can know who ur mother is, if I tried hard enough. then again, I managed to know quite a bit of history abt both of them)

I didnt really take much noticed of them, except during lunch hrs or when they have work-related issues with me, we will talk a while. otherwise I am absolutely with my black ah neh community and their world.

So this Stunning Msian, Lets call her S. She had this sophiscated looks about her, and I managed to give her a lift from my house to her place in CCK (we both lived close) and she filled the whole car with her strong perfume that even my car freshener admit defeat.

We talked, mostly about other colleague. or about my fellow dept gal, whom is in love with that married guy. But of coz, she nvr talked abt her own. and she kept referring to herself as 'single' and looking for 'boyfriend' .

I find it amusing, that people I worked with, for the past 8 mths, we thought we knew each other, but the fact is, we hardly know each other at all. I would nvr have knew the single gal in my dept, who is ever so quiet, to be a third party in some ppl marriage. Or the gal whom I drove home ever so frequently, a married gal of several yrs, or the gorgeous receptionist below, to be a twice married mother of 2.

My dept gal, lets call her C. bears a striking resemblance to N. both in looks and character. but like all history lessons, we tend to duplicate our plight similiarly. She was attached, and didnt really looked at me. But of course, I do not think of N these yrs that much. But happy that everyday, the gal whom walked is, is as if N came in and talked to me. I chose to remain this way. the last I heard, the guy whom she is with, K, was my new competitor in a new grouting product he was asked to developed.

she herself is also leaving G anytime I forsee that would be after we received our April incentive bonus. I forsee quite a few leaving the organisation. Because some of them really cannot stand the new CEO attitude and work management.

But if you were to ask me, would I feel sad that she leaving? I feel. surprisely, normal. Perhaps a little bit down but, still functioning well.

Anyway this story is not about her entirely, but the S gal. She was C best 'sister' in the organisation. She was pretty warmed up alright. We talked about many things. We have common interest, like she totally hated hot drinks, (same as me), liked teh peng (ice-milked tea, same as me) , she like driving and going for spins (which I once let her drive to G on a Saturday morning when we are working the same shift) , likes food and fond of supper, and easily the most engaging conversationists I ever had in a gal.

We managed to hit it off quite well. (I knew about her statud, I assumed she doesnt know I knew, or she wouldnt have told me blantantly that she is 'single' right? )
But in all chummy good relationship and across the street neighbour, I didnt let all these affect our so called -good colleagueship-.

then she knew I nvr really have lunch during lunchtimes (I usually buried in work during lunchtime, and Tuas food really sucked anyway) , she would call me and ask me if I want anything. I usually replied 'No' and crack some jokes before shutting the phone.

but the next instance, I would see, at around 1pm, when she returned, a packet of chicken rice on my table. (Drumstick no less). I was surprised. i offer to pay, she insisted that this is a treat from her, and if i must pay, treat her to a meal next time outside. Which I agreed in a jiffy.

then the sms-es that came in, usually after work. when I am as usual, stuck in office dealing with my mountains of paperwork. "asking me how I was coping."
"asking me if i am hungry" "asking me about other colleagues affairs".

I take no heed about the signs of... you-know-what. because in all chummy r/s, I was very open to the fact that I could be over-reacting anyway. So I take no heed. no notice.

only recently when, the gal who isnt gd looking, Y, is having her bdae in April. Initially some drinking session and asked if I could recommend. I told her she could come to my usual hangout in SJP. I could book a table, and you gals could chill out, while I get my beng friends to join in.

SO she invited, S & V along. S was asking me if I could fetch her to SJP since I lived so near to her anyway. And we were just finishing our Spore MAritime exhibitoon, i felt I deserved a break for these 3 days of exhibiting.

FOr some reason, V decided to pilot the event, and ended up, I have S & Y that day. But my friends did not ditched me, Milk, John and Wilson were there. Y was very friendly, but seems that because of her.. face perhaps. the guys wasnt too keen to strike off with her. and S was like.. spending all night talking to me and acting really silent to others.

S must have over-drank that night, or because she was really high, that I do not know. I ended up sending milk, S and Y home. Since we all lived in Jurong, Bukit batok and CCK respectively.

After dropping off milk, Y & S carried on the journey back to bukit batok when S wanted to throw up, which i promptely stopped the car. and she puked a gd one on my car door outside. I sensed that it isnt a very good thing for her (and my car), so I speeded up and send Y home.

It was around 3am when I reached S void deck. But she is sound asleep. I tried shaking her mildly, and call out her name. But she seems dead to the world. I left the windows slightly open, the car engine was still running, and i remember turning on the radio softer, and watched her sleep, hoping she will wake up.

She wasnt facing me that time, so after like a mere 10 seconds, i turned towards the window and stared outside the bin below her block.

-then I heard it-

Soft moans.

From our back-to-back posture, she had turned in my direction, and she was making those... sounds. I turned back and she was really high I guess. She was muttering in her 'slumber' and moaning.

So this is too much for me, I open the door and got out, stretching myself and looking around. and at that very instance I did that, she 'awoke' got out and apologised to me.

S: "sorry I fell asleep in ur car"

Me: "its ok, its normal that ppl who drank too much will be like this"

S: "Sorry sorry, make you see the ugly side of me"

I was amused, I merely smiled and told her to get homme, get a quick shower and get to bed.

I didnt think much about this episode, but mind you, at 4am when I finally get my butt back in bed, the sms-es came in again, again the same old sentences, I replied its ok. I am working that morning, I slept for about 3 hrs before getting out.

I am suffering from the most terric hangover that morning, Desmond *my colleague* assumed I had a wild night, but the fact i hardly drank, and i merely was an 'ahmad' role anyway.

So since that day, she been asking me to go for dinners (twice) and drinking sessions at upper bukit timah (once), shopping (once) all in the pretext of the convenience of me having a vehicle, or ulterior motive, or really lonely, that I nvr asked, nor I wanted to know. I just went along with it in good old' fashion fun.

We do give each other treats. Sometimes she pay, sometimes i pay. She is quite wealthy, for a Malaysian, I was surprised. and her coach bags and credit cards to show for it. HEr choice of resturant is also an eye opener.

She recently been asking me for a show with her because we both liked horror shows a lot. and this is one of my passion during my weekends. MOvies.

Never once did she mentioned anything about her life, her family or her private stuffs. So as a friend, or a colleague, which I am extrememly professional in this case. I wo0ndered if we are stepping on the line? or am I being too friendly? or is this just normal?

of course I should be flattered that this stunning young woman showned an interest with me going out. But somehow, I felt, am I taking too much of each other time? or should i stop all these?

Y and V does know that we went out, and they think its kinda normal. Even Y asked me out, because she mentioned, 'S ask you out also mah, you shld have no problem saying yes right?'

BUt i told Y because S lived like 5 mins away from me, you lived in BB, maybe we could go out for dinner when we aint doing OT next time.

But anyway S wont be staying in G for long, she did hinted that she went for an interview like last week and it went well. I forsee both C & S will leave G after april. I felt maybe, its all pre-arranged.

I could still hang out with them, until they depart from G. and I could go back to my own life again. but somehow in my heart, I couldnt help heaving a sigh, that both of them are leaving. So tell me, am I normal? I dont even know what am I thinking anyway.

I just had a seizure yesterday from talking to the ah nehs. I took half a day off to see the doc. who deduced i am suffering from stress-related ailments. (high BP, dilated pupiles, nervousness and sleeplessness)

He prescribed me '2 days MC' which I declined and asked for 1 day instead. (Because Eric is still in his critical stages of his hand foot mouth disesase)

I am not supposed to be flaring out easily at my workers, I am not supposed to be too excited or angry, and avoid oily and high cholestrol food. and all these happened in a period of 8 mths, both in health and mental well-being. HEck I dont even have any ailments while in PSM.

Maybe the work in there gets to me. real bad. and the people, affects me. In one way or another. What do you guys think. I love to see your comments.

till again, you wont see any of those bare-it-all-blog for a long time anyway. COMMENT AWAY!